Bad Lieutenant: Port of New Orleans

Um….what? Seriously, was this made on a dare? Val Kilmer and Nicholas Cage running around New Orleans, the latter having public sex with underaged hookers and doing piles and piles of drugs (mostly snorted)…exchanges like ‘get those fucking iguanas OFF my table!” “Ain’t no iguanas.”…from the director of “Grizzly Man” and “Stroszek”…did I mention it stars Nicholas Cage?

Some more random thoughts:
-Is anyone in this movie attempting a southern accent of any kind? I ask because I genuinely can’t tell from the trailer. It sounded maybeeee like Kilmer and Cage were…but not really.

-”Shoot him again. His soul is still dancing.” Breakdancing!

-the visual effects for the titles look cheesy, cheap, even. Is this because it’s a promo trailer or did they just not have a budget?

-I still haven’t seen the original ‘Bad Lieutenant’, so it’s not like there’s anything beloved in my memory to be tarnished. That aside, this almost seems like an R-rated episode of any given cop show on TV now.

I’m hoping this is a film of extremes- either it will be so bad it’s amazing (a la “Showgirls” or Nic Cage’s last howler, “Crazy She-Bitches of Honeybee Island” aka “The Wicker Man” remake), or perhaps good in some way I’m not seeing from the trailer. More likely it will be terribly terribly terrible.

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  1. Yeah, boy, this looks like a cheap made-for-TV John Woo wannabe…even the cheap made-for-TV version of ‘To Catch A Thief’ looks better than this. Was it even shot in New Orleans?

    Woo did it better. Hey, that’s a good motto for anyone attempting fancy gunplay and action in a New Orleans underworld setting. They should have consulted ‘Hard Target’ before going into production on this.

    And where is Lance Henriksen these days? I miss him.


    1. Lance Henriksen remains stable in his isobaric chamber awaiting casting in “Pumpkinhead 3-D”. I miss him as well; he’s better than most of the dreck he ends up in, and yet it serves him as a proper setting for a fine gem.


    2. looks pretty terrible. the original is pretty great but I don’t know if you can use the word beloved on it. it’s basically Harvey Kietel doing a lot of sex drugs and beating up people. then some crying. then some more. but it’s a good movie.


      1. People use ‘beloved’ to describe plenty of things far worse. I’ve heard it applied to the “Leprechaun” series of films, for example.