animated gifs

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Looking for a capper to an online conversation touting the virtues of Wittgenstein and Sartre (FINE, it was really about pizza and how rad it is) I sought a simple Terminator GIF with which to end the conversation. None to be found! HOW CAN YOU LET ME DOWN LIKE THAT, INTERNET? I found something missing, and was duty-bound to fill the void. There you go folks, enjoy.

 

terminated

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DAMES!!!

 

Images from the absolutely amazing Movie Title Stills Collection. Only click if you like typography and have several hours free.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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‘Shooting Shark’ is a strange video even by the standards of a band known for their strange videos. How best to sum up Blue Oyster Cult’s tale of lovers recoiling in pain and anger yet reunited through destiny? This’ll do nicely:

There are many sexy sort-of animal ladies to go around.

The setting changes inexplicably (I use the word loosely here) from Magic Jazzercize Ritual to Renaissance Faire in an English Garden as the hero attempts to capture his lost lady love.

Here’s an excellent example of my favorite 80s video shot composition – Confused Hero in the foreground looking about wildly, Other Person running away, yet pausing dramatically to look at them, in the background. Also seen in : ‘Hungry Like The Wolf’, ‘Don’t Come Around Here No More’, ‘I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For’, and many more.

They managed to cram in a tribute to ‘Altered States’…

…AND ‘The Man Who Laughs‘! Now THAT is impressive.

The best part of this music video is its protagonist – presented without irony, Our Hero is a slightly pudgy, intense man sporting a 70s mustache and wearing a tank top as he fever dreams his way through a nightmare relationship. And wishes on stars.

IT’S SO BEAUUUUTIFUL!

(Thanks to Nate Doyle for bringing this video’s existence to my attention.)

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These gifs are the result of another dip in the Prelinger Archives.Remember folks, your tax dollars paid for these films, and they belong to the American public. Take advantage of them, edit them, or at least enjoy their campy goodness!

Here’s one from the classic ‘Are You Popular?’, featuring The Bad Girl. She is not popular because of/despite ‘parking’ with the boys. THE BOYS! PLURAL!

No wonder everyone at this table shuns her and talks about her behind her back! Unlike The Good Girl, who’s not wearing jewelry or makeup and instantly gets asked out by every guy.

Compared to today’s message of…actually I don’t even know what they’re foisting upon the youths of today- superabstinence? Fear and mystery of the Other? In any case, it’s refreshing to see dating a wide variety of people was considered not only normal but necessary to develop good social skills and learn what sort of person you liked to be with. It did NOT make you a tramp, though apparently it did if you ‘parked’.

The following are from what I consider the gem of the Prelinger collection, ‘Live And Learn’, aka ‘You’ll Poke Your Eye Out: The Movie’. Every scenario shows the horrifying results of…well, pretty much doing anything at all.

The staginess of him ‘pausing’ and checking the canister KILLS me. Also it eventually kills him.

ACTING!


Not a gif but it nicely captures the tone of the film.

This is what I imagine when someone suggests I watch their kids:

I could watch this for years:

His ‘fall’! The dummy! I cut it out, but the part where he gets up just fine and THEN remembers he ‘broke’ his wrist! GENIUS!

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