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Neither snow nor rain nor gloom of night shall keep this writer from their appointed internet contests. As promised, it’s GIVEAWAY TIME! Up for grabs – a well-loved copy of Monarch Hand Knit Styles #95 :

This lovely volume is a compendium of chunkier knits from previous Monarch issues, chosen ‘for quick knitting!’.

This could be YOU admiring Mexican folk pottery!

The giveaway is a thank-you to all you readers I was surprised to find I had, who came out of the woodwork with your greatly appreciated well-wishes. Now, I hold no truck with this ‘random number generator’ pap, nor do I appreciate having to jump through hoops ‘friending’ this and tweeting that just to earn the possibility of getting free stuff. No, all you have to do to enter this contest is, in 500 words or less, explain what is happening in this photo:

That’s it! Don’t by any means feel constrained to literalness or logic. Email your response to with the header ‘CONTEST ENTRY’ by, let’s see…MIDNIGHT, May 18th. That should give everyone ample time. I’ll announce a prizewinner on May 21st, and post the winning entry. Huzzah!

On a down note, this officially marks the end of free vintage pattern posts on the site. However, as I have waaaaaay too many vintage pattern books, this is by no means the last contest or giveaway over here. I just won’t post any more pattern scans, which blows because my love of obsessive hoarding is matched only by my need to compulsively share that which I’ve hoarded. In the future (the near future!), I’ll share patterns I’ve come up with myself, both free and for sale, of the knitting and stitching variety. Here’s to the future!

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Bob Barker’s contempt for the younger generation must haunt his dreams.

At a family reunion following Barker’s retirement, our grandmother gathered all her grandchildren around and personally admonished each of us for not going on the show. It had been a lifelong dream to see one of her relatives win on the Price is Right while Bob hosted, preferably wearing a shirt emblazoned with her face and the message ‘My Grandma Loves Bob!’, and we absolutely let her down. Even great-grandchildren wouldn’t make up for this failure.

“Name an animal with three letters in its name.” Son- “Frog.” Father- “Alligator.”

A nerd early on, I remember watching this episode when it first aired, torn between cheering for Stephen King or David Duchovny. Lynn Redgrave is shriller than I recall, and I remember my younger self wanting to slap her when, after getting slammed the entire round, she held her buzzer aloft and whined ‘I don’t think this is working!’ No, Lynn, you’re out of your league. Walk away. Just walk away.

Does anyone else recall an episode of Jeopardy! where every category was named after a Joy Division song? I swear I watched it with my own eyes, and yet can find no trace of it. Wait, wait….thanks internet. ‘Warsaw’ was facts about Poland, ‘She’s Lost Control’ had questions about famous women who went crazy, and ‘”Joy” Division’s answers had ‘joy’ in them, which seems fairly perverse on the part of whatever mopey writer got away with it.

And then there’s this:

It’s like hearing the Pope curse!

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