star trek

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I came across this image out of nowhere last week and decided immediately I must find a pattern inspired by it to share.

For those unfamiliar this is not a photoshopped image from someone’s Prisoner/Star Trek crossover fanfiction, but a still from original series Star Trek episode ‘Squire of Gothos’. Wikipedia’s episode overview, ‘A powerful being torments the crew of the Enterprise’, applies to nearly any episode and is as useful as ‘Kirk disregards the Prime Directive’ or ‘A primitive society’s god is really a supercomputer’ as a distinguisher.


He’s so happy! Kirk’s just hating in the background.

So, Adam Ant teleports some of the crew down, shenanigans ensue, alien life gets punched and a computer gets smashed. There’s also swordfightery!

But this episode wasn’t just about the dudes of the crew; a lesser-known yeoman catching the villain’s eye is also thrown into the works. Aside from thinly-veiled social commentary dressed up in cheap sets, Star Trek also reflected its age in the way it portrayed women. Sure, it’s great that they even featured women working on a sort-of similar level to men, but just as often those ladies were in skimpy costumes or had to be rescued or let pesky emotions get in the way of doing their job.


Except for T’Ping. Cold As Ice.

I despaired of finding a pattern that somehow combined the weirdness of 60′s modern with sci-fi elements and a throwback to the 1800s, but then I came across Holiday Handknits. I’ll let the images speak for themselves (the Star Trek images are courtesy of Sheryl’s Star Trek Women).

(I think Mrs. Robinson’s got her eye on your boyfriend.)


(I know, I know- technically not a woman but an android.)

…Which brings us around to this week’s pattern, one of the few that embodies its era’s style while still appealing to a modern sensibility. This little crocheted number could be dressed down with a shirt underneath or dressed up with…a handful of ostrich feathers…as seen here…

Fandancing Time!

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Walking around Gowanus I was stopped in my tracks by an oddly familiar minivan. Upon closer inspection, it was gussied up to look like the USS Enterprise:

USS Minivan

Phaser Bombardment!

Star Fleet Academy

Upon even closer inspection, it was nerdier than I thought; the call number USS Enterprise NCC-1701-D is specifically the ship from Next Generation. NERRRRRRD! Everyone knows Kirk’s brand of kick-ass space justice, constantly flouting the Prime Directive, is far more entertaining than Picard’s Shakesperian diplomacy. I am willing, however, to debate the merits of Spock vs. Data.
USS Enterprise

I knew it wasn’t the original call number, but had to look up which ship it was on Wikipedia. Am I surprised each of the different Enterprises has its own Wikipedia page? No. Am I disappointed? ….No. Also, you don’t know nerdy until you click ‘discussions’ on any of these pages. A sampling:

“Can someone point me to the source of the “463 m (1,521 ft)” figure for the width of the Ent-D? The Technical Manual, which at a glance doesn’t seem to explicitly list dimensions, does however suggest 388.36 metres on page 20. AlistairMcMillan

I believe this information is in the ST:DS9 Technical Manual; I don’t have it handy, but specs for numerous classes are in there. E Pluribus Anthon ”

“Um, I hate to point this out here, but these timelines (the Okuda one and the Spaceflight Chronology) are entirely incompatible. By the 2130s in the Spaceflight Chronology the Federation has been formed already (in the 2080s) and the Romulan War is done and over with (in the 2100s). you can’t just graft dates from one to the other. Morwen – Talk 14:24, 11 November 2006 (UTC)”

“At the moment there is a *lot* of detail about the shooting models and modifications thereof, and far less about the ship’s history on screen and associated mythology. Surely for a general Wikipedia article, i.e. one that will be where the man in the street goes for info on the “Starship Enterprise”, we should focus more on the ship’s role in the show, the basics of its mission, a little bit on its internal layout and much more on where it has had an impact in the real world?”

Oh, sweet irony. What I’m reading on the discussion pages IS the impact the USS Enterprise had on the real world! Also, it’s so cute how the writer assumes the ‘man in the street’ needs access to information about a fictional sci-fi ship.

*Alternate Titles:
Our 5-Year Mission: Get The Kids To Soccer Practice On Time
Beam Me Up, Mom
This Minivan Can Do Warp 8

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